You Just Contradicted Yo'self, Son.

I lied. I have not found myself. I quote myself, "You must find yourself, them, and a haven."

Bullshit. I am a big fat liar. I have not found myself nor am I anywhere near finding myself. I am not even looking for I have no idea where to even start.

You know what you got to do?

You must find that passion. An undying, enduring passion. A passion that fires your insides up, a passion that is never ending. A passion that defines, you. Makes, you. Is, you.

People are often living with their objective of being happy. In many ways, concluding that happiness equals success.

Success, what is success to you, me, and everyone around us?

That passion, the passion that is you, will make you happy.

People come and go, it's a given.

However, that passion that is a part of you, is you. Will stay with you.

Success.

You must find yourself that passion. That unrelenting passion.

BUT...

Because there is a 'but' for everything.

Happiness doesn't get you everywhere.

Happiness is a state of mind.

According to dictionary.com, success, is the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.

Do you even have talent in that passion?

Do you have enough faith in yourself and that passion of your's to legitimately succeed?

Can that passion lead you to really, succeed?

Will that passion allow you to survive in this kind of world?

You Ah' GorJES, Lav!

Three is a good number. Though my favorite number is seven, three is overall a good number.

You know what you got to do?

You have to find yourself. And you must find Them. You need to find yourself a haven.

No matter what, you must find yourself, them, and a haven.

Once you've found yourself and them, you won't need to search for the haven. It will all fit like a puzzle piece.

Talk, laugh, eat, sleep, complain, whine, eat, text, phone conversations, sleepover, tacos, movies, eat, eat, eat, go on diets and gain more weight, Vons, eat, boba, gossip, plan, makeup, eat, Friday nights, talk, blogspot, complain to each other about each other, eat, talk shit in front of each other, hit each other senseless, scream at each other, hit some more, eat, roll eyes, silent cuss-fights, get over it, talk, eat.

You must find yourself that haven.

Never Know What You Got, Till it's Gone.

Lately, I feel as if I am walking on a path that does not belong to me.

Mind over matter. How much I love this quote. Mind over matter, that's all there is to it. Once you've set your mind onto something, you've got the power to do anything you want. The mind will give us the driving force that the body can fail to do. Whether it be running miles and your body is screaming, pleading for you to stop, the mind takes control and allows us to finish the mile. Whether it be picking up that last piece of chocolate, the mind holds the fingers down from grabbing the little devil. Mind over matter. Flawless, a fact, a perfect guide to live by.

Or that is what we want to believe. That is what the mind wants us to perceive.

How easy the mind is to trick and how easy the mind will give into the heart.

When it is the mind versus the heart, it is always the heart that wins.

The heart is victorious.

Because in many ways, the heart is the strongest part of the body.

For the arm, the leg, the stomach, the mouth, and every other part of the body is able to be cured by doctors, the heart mends itself. When a heart is left broken into a billion pieces, we do not ask the doctor to sew up our heart back together.

With the heart's unique ability to sew itself back, whether the heart prefers eating a pint of ice cream or whether the heart prefers crying it's sorrow out, all in all, it is healed.

How foolish for a person to believe the mind can be unbeaten.

Though, I forgive myself. For one day, my mind will be victorious and unbeatable.

One of my life goals: To take a long vacation somewhere far far away, all by myself.

I Know You' Mocking Me.

"I am happy,' that's just the saddest lie."

Now, want me to tell you why I love sleepless cities so much? Because not only are they pretty, they're sad. It's all a facade.

Tumblr's the new "it" thing these days. But I'll stick with blogspot because I've already put half my emotions into it, no point in finding a new haven.

And because it was my brother's fifteenth birthday on Saturday.

You're growing way too fast. I hope you get into tennis next year, and I hope you continue to pursue piano. Because if I were to turn back time, I would have stuck with piano too. And although I hate to admit it and wish it were me, you are extremely talented in piano, music, and the other arts. I'm sorry I never buy you any presents, when I get a job, I promise to take you shopping. I hope you grow to be the "man" of the family and take care of umma when I make her cry and all that. I'm the worst sister and family member alive, but I'm always rooting for you.

In the long run, my family comes first.

I'm in some sort of a slump these days. I've got nothing on my mind and lulling around like life is a joke. My minds in some sort of a reverie, except it isn't so dreamy. No thoughts on the past, present, or future. Still staying up until four, wasting my time on useless things. Or sometimes knocking out for a day with no break.

Until then, it is what it is.

I will be back.