Today is December 19, 2009 and approximately 1:28AM.
Similar times, yet different. SO VERY DIFFERENT.
Good and bad all the same. And I thought today deserved a post, because it's winter break!
In many ways I miss last year's winter break a lot. But that's okay because I have a lot better things to think about and do this winter break. To add, it's my last and final year in high school! F.I.N.A.L.L.Y.
I'm a hater this year. Like get out of my face.
I want a camera really bad, one or two, maybe more.
I want a Fujifilm Instax Mini 7. I want an antique looking film camera. I want a DSLR camera, still deciding whether it be a Canon or Nikon. Maybe if I go to Best Buy and touch all the different SLR's, like in Harry Potter, the wand would choose me! Except it'd be a camera. And last but not least, I want a video recorder, just because I think I'll need it for the summer. Maybe I'll throw in a voice recording cassette just to record myself when I find myself talking to myself or when I'm too lazy to pick up a pen or turn on my laptop.
I'm all into pictures these days and what sort of meaning they can convey. I stare at each picture that create some sort of interest in me for five minutes and my imaginations run wild. Beauty.
I don't know why, but I miss summer a lot. August, to be more specific. I miss it all. I don't even think I did anything too adventurous. I miss Jane's wake up calls at way too early in the morning. I miss being grumpy to everything in my way because I was up too early. I miss walking into chlorine smelling gym every morning dreading my summer turnout. I miss listening to my IPOD, listening to the most beautiful voices I've ever heard, staring straight ahead dreaming of what's to come. I miss coming home to a sleepy Momo greeting me and taking a shower depending on my schedule. (Yes, I'm gross.) I miss eating baby carrots. I miss having to take nine extra hours of driving practice because I suck. I miss watching TV falling asleep on the couch, with carrots half-way chewed, and still nasty from the gym on days I had nothing to do. I miss doing God knows what I did after the gym, I seriously don't remember at all. I miss talking about 2010 summer plans with my lovers. I miss talking about orange shirts, bean poles, dropped earrings, snappy attitudes! I miss crying on some nights because I was impatient. I miss eating dinner with my lovers. I miss calling my Baby Mama on random days because I was bored and talking to her about random stuff.
What a reminiscent paragraph.
I wish I could still cry over what I was crying about.
I hate change. But I hate my change of heart even more.
